Not sure what is appropriate? Choose your relationship to the person who died to see what to send, what to write on the card, where to deliver and when.
General etiquette
- Check the obituary first. “In lieu of flowers” means the family prefers a donation to a named charity.
- Funeral home or home? Larger arrangements (standing sprays, wreaths) go to the funeral home or service location. Smaller vase arrangements and plants are better sent to the family’s home.
- Casket sprays are usually chosen by the immediate family.
- Sign the card clearly with your full name, and your relationship if the family may not know you, so they can send thanks.
- After the service, a plant or bouquet sent to the home a few weeks later is often especially welcome.
Religious and cultural customs
Flowers are customary at most Christian funerals. They are not traditional at Jewish funerals, and practices vary in Muslim, Hindu and Buddhist communities. When in doubt, ask the funeral home or a family friend.